A Buck for Showing Up

Sometimes there is debauchery that goes on in this blog, this is one of those times.

Me and 3 of my friends all decided to go out and celebrate one of their 2 week old birthdays tonite. That guy would be Steve. Steve is the one that was wearing the picture of the shirt above, I thought it was funny to snap a picture and share with Mr. Defruiter.

The night started at Claim Jumper. That freaking restaurant's portions put places like Buca di Beppos to shame. We got the sampler appetizer and the plate was like a foot and a half long just covered in tasty bites that you would expect from an appetizer sampler. I got the 24oz prime rib and I couldn't freaking finish it. It was huge and the sides were huge. That tells you how much food was there.

We then moved to Christie's. It's right off I-10 by the Arizona mills mall. That area is pretty commercial and pretty public. When they first started to build Christie's a lot of people were up in arms because of the location of the strip club so close to "civilization". We roll up into Christie's about 8pm or so. It was already pretty packed, they sit us on the outskirts tables. It's $10 a table dance and no couch dances. The girls were pretty good looking, there were a number of thick girls so I was pretty ok with it. But then they started ignoring us, we turned down two table dances because we hadn't been there but like 3 minutes and didn't have our first drinks yet. Nobody, other than the waitress, ever talked to us again. After about 45 minutes or so, we were like "screw this place, if they don't wanna take our money, fine, we'll go elsewhere". We then went to Bliss, which is about 30-40 minutes away via freeway.

Bliss is out of the way. It's much less class than Christie's, but the girls tend to do "more for ya". I didn't get a couch dance ($10), I was content with just sitting at the stage. Let me tell you something, there is pretty much one place in the world that it's good to be a big guy and it's at a strip club. Where normal girls maybe be like "ewww, a fat guy" the stripper is like "oooo...a pommel horse". I got three headstands from my crouch. Plenty of legs on the shoulders with my face right in her crouch and plenty of girls leaning right on me to shove my face between her boobs. One girls was like "hey, I see that you couldn't stay away" and I was like "whoa, she remembers me". I was happy through the entire song and probably threw some extra 1s on the stage that I normally wouldn't chuck up there. I turn to Brad and was like "she remembers me". He gives me this look like I just signed up to sell Amway and think it's the greatest thing ever. I sit back in my seat and felt like I just got "Marcus'ed". Only Marcus will get that, I suppose I could have went with "Snider'ed" as well, but "Marcus'ed" has a nicer ring to it. We were there till they put the pasties on. All in all, I pretty much love that place.

I'm down about $170 or so, but hey, it was well worth it. Stopped at Krispy Kreme on the way home and got a couple fresh glazed. It was a good night. It's good to hang out with friends every once and a while.

The title comes from what my canadian friend, Brad, and I have dubbed the first dollar that hits the stage.